Mr. Haverford Exclusive: Jake Dewerth-Jaffe…the next starving artist?

Colin McCrossan

If born a girl, his parents would have named him Christine. Now, they call him “Jake”.

 

Ladies and Gentleman, the next interview is in. Meet Mr. Jake Dewerth-Jaffe. Jake is known for his poised yet goofy aesthetic, rocking his trademark square glasses and slight but sassy curls. As previously mentioned, he is a very devout singer, being apart of HHS chamber singers, a continuous member of drama club, and a participant in the PMEA festivals for the past few years.

 

Q: What made you audition for Mr. Haverford?

A: “I watched it last year and was in Austin Yayer’s act. As I watched everyone perform, I thought “this is a great opportunity to get on stage again… let me seize this opportunity next year.”

 

Q: Tell me some background about yourself…

A: “I was born at Delaware County Medical Hospital at 4.5 pounds. I couldn’t breath for the first minute I was alive aka miracle baby. If I were a girl my parents would have named me Christine. Now I’m “Jake”. My mom is a pastor and my dad is a bankruptcy lawyer. I’m balding. I’m about the height of your average woman.”

 

Q: What do you like to do in your free time?

A: “I like to make imaginary friends to compensate for the fact that i have none.” He then added “I wash dishes at cafe d’angelo.”

 

Q: What are you looking most forward to in Mr. Haverford?

A: “ Coming up with my talent- I want to do something revolutionary.”

 

Q: What is your biggest fear?

A: “Probably finding future employment. I will never get a job as an English major.”

 

Q: Any hints you can give us about your Mr. Haverford performance?

A: “No… because I don’t even know yet…”

 

Q: Have you made any new friendships during Mr. Haverford?

A: “I met this one guy named Chris lee. He punched me in the face one time. It was awesome.”

 

Q: Who is your biggest fan?

A: “My cat named Presley because he is so fat. He is too busy to attend the performance unfortunately.” He quickly adds : “Just kidding. He’s actually just too fat.”

 

Q: What are three closing fun facts about you?

1- “Two words to describe me are queer and spontaneous.”

2- “If I could wear one color for the rest of my life it would be white.”

3- “My favorite quote is ‘cheese’ by Maya Angelou.”